When are Crazy Sexy Cancer AND Evidence Based Medicine Both Bullshit?

I'm replying to Jody's "Back to Reality" post and she is discussing
Kris Carr's Crazy Sexy Cancer Article

Jody says MUCH of what I wanted to say about Carr's article in the times. When people forwarded it to me they said, "Inspirational isn't it?" And I wanted to say, "Sure, it's inspirational, but... this ISN'T what cancer looks like, always." On the other hand, I was once talking to a friend in a wheel chair who pointed out to me, "Why CAN'T people in wheel chairs be sexualized? Why CAN'T people fetishize us just like they do other woman? Why is it, sicker or worse when they do it to us than when they do it to women who aren't disabled?"

And I realized, ok - SOMETIMES that IS what cancer looks like. SOMETIMES people DO kick cancers ass. Sometimes people do run every day, eat healthy food, and get all, "rah rah rah go team" during cancer treatment- DEPENDING on the type of cancer they have and the extent and duration of the treatment. Sometimes it CAN look like that. And -- People LOVE a RAH RAH RAH *CHEER LEADER KICK* story.

People DO NOT like the reality of most illness stories. People don't like what it is to grit it out, to cry, to sit in the darkness of bleak nights - the soul search. Death vigils, or even barely surviving and going into remission, but having long ptsd, or depression, and having to take anti-depressants for a long time afterward, and needing therapy for a while. People don't like the stories of losing friends or lovers or spouses, or that your husband cheats on you or (like me, just fucking divorces you in the middle of the worst of it).

No- they WANT crazy sexy illness. They want to think "OH YES- THIS IS THE KIND OF ILLNESS I WOULD HAVE." No one wants to think they would get ill anyway- but *if* they did, surely they would be crazy sexy during it. Meowza.

My other bigger issue is this: NO ONE - ABSOLUTELY NO ONE- gets to diagnose us into bad health. And NO ONE gets to tell us how we will FEEL during it. There is NO right way to do illness. There is NO way to do it right or wrong. That means - even "evidence based" medicine - while powerful and compelling - doesn't motivate me completely. I STILL have a right to get massage and meditate, and do reiki, and hell- if I want to fucking drink green shit - I CAN FUCKING DRINK GREEN SHIT. And unless my doctor has a VERY compelling reason why not- FUCK THEM. They aren't my boss, they are my TEAM. *I* am in the middle of my healthcare team.

And it is VERY VERY VERY important to remember just WHO AND HOW medical research is funded right now. It is saddens me to say it - but it is NOT being funded equitably to included CAM or many integrative methods. IT SHOULD BE BUT IT IS NOT.

So-- Unless there are compelling reasons WHY something will harm us - and it makes us FEEL BETTER and we WANT to do it - WHY NOT DO IT? (Like acupuncture or reiki etc).

I like to take plenty of B vitamins, D, and magnesium. And frankly - I was taking fish oil long before it was "evidence based" to help with joint pain. Why? BECAUSE IT HELPED WITH MY JOINT PAIN. Who told me - a CAM/integrative MD. And lo- behold... my rheum YEARS LATER handed me a JAMA article about how it will help with my bone swelling and pain. YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS LATER. I laughed and added more fish oil.

And now - I take more vitamin D than ever. Why? Because it is evidence based. But I was ALREADY DOING IT. I've had an onc tell my father that it might not be good with his chemo. And I asked for the evidence. Not just because he didn't THINK SO- but REALLY sound evidence. Because really- we lose our magnesium during chemo - and frankly- we feel like shit during it. Magnesium is good. I don't want an onc THINKING it will be a bad thing to take magnesium - I want to KNOW it will be bad. And then fine.

I am sick of doctors not liking empowered patients who heal through food. There are too many patients who hoover down shit loads of fast food and awful food and make themselves SICK with shitty food and doctors bitch about them... but when the opposite happens - healing WITH GOOD FOOD (and whole food) -- there is a backlash-- and doctors consider it almost treason to remove gluten or toxic foods like sugar. They almost act as though shoving a donut, big mac, large fries, and supersized coke into our face is BETTER than eating a spinach salad and being AWARE and healthful.

So -- that is my take on crazy sex cancer and evidence based medicine and trusting your doctor and being a team and being willing to be INTEGRATIVE and recognize that there are multiple issues at work. And many doctors have been steeped in western medicine and would rather solve a problem with an Rx pad than lifestyle changes EVEN if lifestyle changes are JUST as effective.

And sometimes - like cancer or other illness which REQUIRE an Rx - well-- those might need BOTH. And I haven't even mentioned spirituality here - but those are powerful forces in people's lives for those who do believe.

Let's just say, I'm in the middle here - I don't think cancer is all that crazy sexy - but I don't think the white coat will save me either. I call bullshit on BOTH OF THEM. I will use the best of both of them too!